not dead yet

Yeah, so, it looks like I am still alive for now.  I have nothing of interest so say, which means I am posting this merely as a procrastination exercise.  A huge-ass stack of final exams is sitting on my desk (a mere eight inches from my left hand!  help!) waiting to be graded. 

It is all lovely and spring-like and beautiful outside and has been all week, and all I want to do is take the dog to the park every day.  Sadly, no.  I must grade stupid finals.  Whine, whine.

I’ll be back later with an end-of-term grammar round up, in which I promise I will threaten to cut at least one person.  I hope you are all doing lovely things, like taking your dogs to the park or relaxing or drinking champagne.   You big jerks.


  1. 1. Take fistful of exams
    2. Find large stairwell
    3. Pitch exams down stairwell
    4. Grade as follows:
    Those that fall the furthest get the highest grades. Why? They’re less heavy and contain less BS. The heavier exams (those chock-full of BS) travel the shortest distance. These get poorer grades.
    5. Total marking time: 10 mins + cleanup.

    Just because you suggested that you hope we are doing lovely things, tonight I’m going on a bender!

    Remember: exams, stairwell, throw, grade, whiskey!


  2. I think you may have spelled “pedagogy” incorrectly in the label/tag/thingie on this post. Is there supposed to be an “a” after the “p”? Or is this some clever and/or cryptic play on words that has gone over my head?

    Please don’t cut me for pointing this out/exposing my own ignorance/wasting time at work.


  3. That is how I always spell it – it’s not the most common spelling, but the OED supports it.

    (Since the OED online is a subscription service, that URL will only be valid for 3 days.)

    [Ed note: I had to nix the link. Either it already expired or you DO have to be logged in to the OED to see it. Though they claim that’s not true. I don’t know. Furthermore,I don’t know why it isn’t a free service. Bah.]


  4. John– though I did not use your method for the actual grading, I think I might just drink whiskey and throw the offending exams around just for kicks. We’ll see!

    Dan– You know what they are doing? Having gay sex. Totally.


  5. Make sure to leave some shoeprints on the exams. That way the students know what you think of them (and who’s the boss).


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