In college, one of my favorite professors once commended me on having a “strong, masculine prose style.” Go ahead, take a moment to unfasten all of the weird cultural assumptions underpinning that statement — I’ll wait.
Now, whether or not you have an English Grammar professor on hand to evaluate the relative femininity or masculinity of your prose, you can still find out if you write like a girl:
Yes, thank dog, the internet has everything! Here are the results of their analysis of this very blog:
Judges’ scores are in. Clearly I do have a strong masculine prose style! So strong, in fact, that they are 95% certain I am a dude. That is even more sure than they were the first time I tried their site, back when Blandwagon posted about it a few days ago. Then they were only 87% sure they knew how it was hanging.
I’m just dying to know what it is that makes them so confident that I am secretly in possession of a big, hairy nut sac. Is it the active verbs? The cussing? My love of pants? My love of whiskey? “We have strong indicators,” they claim, but what are those indicators? They will not say. Maybe they have just been talking to my old grammar prof.
Case Status: Manly