Well, I am mildly embarrassed about the Twitter/TV Spoiler bitchfest I last posted, but this blog has always existed as an airing of grievances, so, um, there you go. Grievance motherfrakking AIRED.
I’ve got a few other grievances to air, but I’ll be brief about these because once they’re aired I can move on to more pleasant news. Brace yourself:
- The morning after our big, glorious snowfall, my car door was frozen shut. Giving a firm, wholehearted tug on the door handle caused me to unintentionally RIP THE HANDLE RIGHT OFF! In order to open my driver’s-side door now, I have to work my fingernail under the remaining stump of the handle and coax it upward. This will mean so many ruined manicures I want to cry.
- After successfully warding off the Goddamned Motherfucking Rat-Bastard Shinsplints for the past seven months of running, I got a horrible case of them in my right leg, which became clear during my Monday run. I guess I also must have over-corrected for it during that (forcedly brief) run, because I managed to strain my right calf and something in my left quad area as well. Am now banished to the recumbent bike over in the corner until it heals.
- I think I might have a cavity.
- There are almost NO jobs at all for me to apply for in the spring market postings.
- My eye appointment of destiny, at which point I will finally be able to replace the thick black horn-rims I have been wearing since the year 2000, keeps not happening for various reasons. (More on this later; it warrants a post all its own.)
- My pectorals and various arm muscles are all crazy sore after a big upper-body workout in the weight room the other day, and today I noticed that even writing on the board in class was taxing me! (Maybe in light of the fact that I accidentally ripped my car apart, I should consider lightening up on the upper-body weights?)
Alrighty, then. Moving on.
Guess what I am doing for spring break, which is coming in only twelve days? I am going to exciting Las Vegas, where I will be hanging out with my two best friends in the entire world!
OH YES INDEEDY.
I will be traveling with my friend Clarabella (whom many of you know in real life or as a frequent commenter here) to visit our other best friend Mel (whom you may also know!), who has been living in in Vegas for about a year and a half. Mel was in law school on the East Coast while I was in grad school on the West Coast, and when we graduated the same year, we swapped — now I live in the East and she’s out West! While these developments have been good for our carreers and such, it surely does make popping by to hang out a bit of a challenge! Thus, while C and I get to see each other relatively often, neither of us has seen M in what feels like forever.
And! Did you know! Mel is the friend I mentioned earlier who just had a baby boy (my second honorary nephew!), and C and I will be able to meet him for the first time. We have already warned M that she will basically not be able to hold her own baby except for feedings, because we’ll be fighting over the little guy the whole time. He’s just adorable in pictures, and I can’t wait to nuzzle his chubby little cheeks in person!
You might assume that, since we’ll be in Vegas, we will be spending a bunch of time and money at the casinos – if we want to, I know that Mel and her husband can be great guides, since her husband is an expert poker player and Mel is no slouch herself. However, I have basically no money to waste, so I don’t want to risk a bunch on gambling. Here’s what I’m thinking: when I was visiting C a few weeks ago, we caught the film 21 on cable. That card-counting scheme looked pretty easy, right? And, I mean, I’m sure no tough Lawrence-Fishburne-esque security guard would beat up a bunch of cute ladies like us! Maybe we should bring the baby for sympathy/distraction. What do you think?