In the interest of getting the baby sleep situation to improve even in the slightest, I am in the process of weaning the off their usual nighttime bottle. They had started sleeping all the way through (8p-6a) without a feeding at 3 months, then at 3.5 months they decided they wanted TWO nighttime bottles, then they went back down to just one, which is where they’ve been for the last month. A few times in the last couple of weeks, the babies have slept through the time when they’d normally eat*, thereby skipping the bottle. On the nights they do wake to eat, they’ve been getting progressively smaller servings. Tonight, if they wake to eat, they’ll only get 1.5 oz. Hopefully soon they won’t even see the point in asking. 

*This is not to say they’ve slept THROUGH, no. Not at all. A certain sweet, blue-eyed baby likes to wake every few minutes for a couple of hours at a time. As in, baby goes to sleep, parent leaves the room, three minutes later baby wakes up crying. Rinse and repeat for two hours. They both have taken to waking at 5, too. Phew. 

I’m officially back to work this week. I’m teaching an online class, so I can “work from home” all summer, if I choose. My husband also can work from home this summer, too, with the exception of certain meetings and other obligations. We’ve been splitting the week, though, to give each of us two weekdays at the office and three at home (we’re home together on Fridays). This seems like a nice amount of time at work for me right now. I get my tasks done, I can take my time eating lunch without anyone screaming at me or barfing on me (or, in fact, even TOUCHING me), and I can stop by the gym on the way home. 

Speaking of the gym: 

This sign is posted above the big public scale outside the student locker rooms at the campus rec center. I thought it was pretty great, so I took the picture and Instagrammed it before my workout. After my workout, I stepped onto the less public scale inside the faculty locker room, saw that I’d gained 3lbs in the last two weeks, and had a mini meltdown in the shower, during which I considered drowning my feelings in donuts. Sigh. Had I already forgotten Ryan Gosling’s wise words? 

The fact is, I have the type of physiology that hangs on to every spare calorie and ounce while breastfeeding. I’m told the weight will go away once I stop breastfeeding, but who can say. It’s just so frustrating! I work out. I’ve stopped with the crazy sweets. I’m eating a perfectly reasonable diet for my metabolism and situation. And yet, the fat pants I bought after the twins were born are starting to get tight. I may not be losing weight, but do I really have to be gaining?! THE GODDAMNED INJUSTICE OF IT ALL, MAN. 

OK, finally. You all know my husband is a lovely person and a very generous man, but I have to say he is stepping in it lately. It’s probably postpartum hormones on top of new-parent stress and exhaustion, but still. He said something the other day that sort of implied he thought I should be doing more yard work. YARD WORK. CAN YOU EVEN. And break one of my perfectly manicured nails?! I mean.