The carby dinner and glass of wine I just had

The long day at work, which includes a lot of unbloggable-yet-exhausting things at this time in the semester

My twin almost-two-year-olds

The one twin who keeps trying to find the most dangerous thing in the room to climb up, dangle off of, and jump down from

The other twin who vastly prefers the other parent and starts a raging tantrum every time I try to do any everyday task like getting out of the crib, changing a diaper, getting dressed, combing hair, putting on shoes, putting in chair for dinner, etc., but who is perfectly fine for the other parent

The sweet, lazy, affectionate, paraplegic old dog who whines and whines and whines every evening after dinner until I position him up on the couch beside me in the precisely correct fashion

My email inbox

My email outbox

My bank account

My diet

The people in the elevator with me

The people I see from a distance waiting for the elevator, whom I don’t want to ride with and therefore have to avoid

Textbook sales reps

Textbook buying reps

The leftover Halloween candy I ate

The leftover Halloween candy I didn’t eat

The fact that my children have been waking up at 4:30 (as opposed to their usual time of 6:30) ever since the end of DST, and no, I know that math does not check out

My body

My mind